67 Year Old "Epic Beard Man" Promises To Kick Ass, And Does

By Darryl Mason

Now everyone has a camera, the one-on-one confrontations of everyday life on public transport that once went unreported now become world news.

How can fake TV drama compete with this?

The Ass-Kicking :



The Aftermath :



If these videos become explosively popular, here's how the news media narrative will likely unfold.

You will see this footage over and over again until you want to snap.

Reporters will track down the EBM and the man he fought, interview them separately and then attempt a meeting and reconciliation.

The Epic Beard Man will become famous as expressing the fears and anxieties of Baby Boomers who now feel they are vulnerable members of society, and much discussion and soul-searching will unfold as 24 hour news channels sacrifice small animals in thanks for this story landing free in their laps, providing days of panel discussion race-related fodder.

The man whose ass was thoroughly kicked, and should have known better than to wind up a pretty fit looking old guy wearing a "I Am A Motherfucker" t-shirt, regardless of his bushranger beard, will slink away from his infamy, but will be mocked by friends, relatives and strangers on the street for years to come.

Epic Beard Man, meanwhile, may become something of a national hero if Fox News goes heavy with it, he will probably meet Sarah Palin, be hailed for standing up to arseholes on public transport and end up scoring a few hundred grand doing ads for some downright American product, and could probably one day demand a suitcase of cash from a razor blade company to get rid of the beard for a TV ad.

Meanwhile, plenty of real news will go unreported.


.